First Love Second Chance Read online

  “It’s rare,” I said, and it was rare. The women I had slept with over the years rarely came from the exhibitions, despite what the tabloids said. I refused to let that part of my life be tainted by getting tangled up with the wrong woman.

  Billy glanced at my bus in confusion. “I’m confused, then. There’s a woman doing yoga in her bra in your bus. You’re telling me that you aren’t hitting that?”

  I fucking wish that I was. I glanced over at the bus, but I couldn’t catch any sight of Ava. I looked over at Billy, who looked away with a guilty expression. I couldn’t help the grin tugging at my lips.

  “I’m sorry,” he said, cheeks reddening. “I thought you were in there, so I was peeking through the windows when I saw her.”

  “If it was someone else looking at her, I’d kick their ass,” I said, squeezing him fondly. “Just a bit of advice is all, bro. Stay out of trouble tonight.”

  “You, too. I appreciate it, man.”

  Billy returned to his seat beneath the sunshade. I nodded goodbye to him before I hurried along the row of buses until I reached mine. I peered inside one of the windows to find Ava in a pair of black yoga pants and a white sports bra. Her dark hair was in a loose braid around her back. Music, the type of serene music I heard in elevators, played softly from inside.

  My mouth went dry as I watched Ava bend over gracefully to touch the front of her toes with her fingers easily. It gave me a nice view of her perfectly tight ass cheeks that were highlighted nicely through those yoga pants.

  “Fucking beautiful,” I murmured, already throbbing with need.

  Our last kiss on the bus had ended in disaster. Ava had remained guarded throughout the rest of the drive to Boston, but all of that was going to change tonight. She had kissed me back. Her body had responded to my touch. We both wanted each other, but she had to be so damn stubborn about everything. That was just Ava’s nature.

  I opened the bus door as quietly as possibly before closing it shut behind me. I slid the lock into place before drawing the shades down. I didn’t want Billy sneaking another glance in my bus to see what we were doing.

  Ava remained oblivious to me coming up from behind. Her eyes were closed. A serene expression spread across her face as she breathed in deeply, holding that position with her ass high in the air. Perfectly level with my cock.

  I reached out to grasp her hips firmly and pulled her backward against me. Ava let out a startled shriek, and she tried to twist around to look at me. Not willing to let her argue her way out of this one, I pressed my lips against hers in a deep kiss that muffled her protests. She struggled against my arms encircling her waist, but her lips glided beneath mine as she returned the kiss. Our tongues tangled for a brief moment before I spun her around so that I could press myself up against her.

  “Stop,” Ava gasped, pulling away before I could kiss her again. “Jude, stop it. We talked about this. You know why we can’t do this.”

  Frustration tore through me. “Why though? I don’t understand.”

  “I already told you why.” Ava slipped away from me, grabbed her shirt, and tugged it on before turning to face me. “I thought you were going to be with someone tonight, so I didn’t think you were going to be in the bus.”

  “It’s my bus,” I stated flatly. “And the only woman I’m with is you.”

  Ava turned away from me to head in the direction of the bunks. She paused before climbing into one of the bunks to look at me with guarded eyes.

  “There are millions of them out there. I think you’re going to be fine without me.”

  “What the fuck, Ava?”

  She didn’t respond and drew the curtain closed. I listened to her settle down in the bunk before complete silence descended over the bus. My erection throbbed painfully from inside of my pants. I debated ripping the curtain off the damn pole, but I forced myself to stalk back into the bedroom to slam the door shut. There would be no sleep with this damn erection throbbing for the one woman who didn’t want anything to do with me because of her own doubts.

  “Fuck this,” I grumbled, stalking to the private bathroom in the back. “I’m going to get pleasure tonight, either way.”

  I twisted the hot water on. Slipping out of my clothes, I stepped into the hot spray with a relieved sigh, despite the ache between my legs. I let the hot spray work away the aches in my muscles from riding hard for the past few hours before focusing on the one organ that needed Ava’s attention the most. I didn’t want to do it. I didn’t want to spoil an amazing orgasm, but I couldn’t stand it any longer. My entire body was going to go blue by the end of all of this.

  I slammed my hand into the shower wall to resist the temptation, though. It wasn’t going to happen like this. I refused to let Ava have control over what happened between us.

  After a shitty night of wet dreams involving Ava tangled up in my bed, I rose early in a foul mood to call Chuck and my driver back to the bus. Ava stepped out of the small bathroom with a towel wrapped about her damp hair when I came back inside the bus. Just thinking about her soapy and naked didn’t help matters as she climbed back into the bunk and pulled the curtain shut to avoid contact.

  Breakfast was just as unbearable. Chuck attempted conversation with Ava, who answered politely, but she pointedly kept her back turned toward me. I downed a cup of coffee with a sigh of aggravation. I couldn’t stand the cold treatment anymore because it was driving me crazy in all the right, fucked up ways.

  “I need to talk to you,” I said before Ava could climb up into the bus. “We need to talk about some shit before you get on that bus.”

  Ava turned to look at me with a cool expression. She folded her arms across her chest as she came back down the bus steps. “What is it?”

  “You’re coming along to write a piece about me,” I said, coming to a stand in front of her. “But you refuse to even get close enough to talk to me. You haven’t spoken a damn word to me all fucking morning.”

  A flicker of nerves went across Ava’s face as she took a step back to put distance between the two of us. As usual. She cleared her throat as she looked away from me.

  “Sometimes I have to recharge before I write. That’s all I’m doing. Writing’s a hard task that you—”

  “Bull fucking shit,” I gritted out, not buying the excuse. “Are you even taking any of this seriously, Ava? Or is it some fucking joke to you?”

  Ava snapped back around to glare at me.

  “Of course I’m taking this seriously. Have you ever taken anything seriously in your life?”

  I curled my hands into fists to keep control of my rapidly fraying temper. “Yeah, once. Back in high school. She told me to go to hell.”

  Ava reared back in shock at those words. I stomped by her to go up the bus steps to let something painful settle into her for once. She had no idea what it felt like to be told to go to hell by the one person she loved more than anything in the world.

  Chapter 10

  Ava

  The lush greenery of Charleston, South Carolina surrounded the bus when we pulled out onto a cobblestone street. I leaned up against the window to watch everything go by, and the buildings reminded me of an Antebellum movie. My head ached horribly. I pressed my forehead up against the cold glass. I tried to focus on the interesting and historic sights of Charleston as we drove by, but it was useless.

  I felt confused about everything when it came to Jude. He had made a career out of himself being a total jackass who wasn’t capable of having any true emotion. Women lapped it up eagerly. The girls in Gypsum back then had lapped it up, too. There were a few other girls after our summer together, after Andy’s death. He never looked my way again after that. We never spoke again.

  A headache pounded in my temples, and my eyes slipped closed. I had been wrong about a lot of things back then, but it still didn’t make up for everything. It didn’t bring my brother back from the grave.

  The bus came to a slow stop. I opened my eyes to find the bus pulled up in a lux
urious hotel parking lot. I stared at the fancy sign out front with an inward groan. There was no way in hell that I could afford a place like this. My editor would have a field day with all these costs

  Chuck rose from his position at the small table behind the driver’s seat. He let out a groan as he stretched before jogging down the stairs to open the door. I waited for Jude’s bedroom door to open, but it remained firmly shut and silent in there. My legs ached as I followed Chuck off the bus into the humid and balmy summer air. He and Mike were glancing over a few papers in the parking lot when I walked up to them.

  “What’s up?” I asked. “What are we doing here?”

  “Stopping for the day,” Chuck said as he rifled through documents in a folder. “JJ hates staying holed up on the bus for too long. The show isn’t until tomorrow, so he wanted to get off the bus.”

  “He’s been holed up in his room all morning. How did you know that?”

  “I know my athlete better than you think,” Chuck said, winking with a chuckle. “He likes to travel with his bikes, but he hates being holed up all the time.”

  “That doesn’t surprise me,” I said, folding my arms over my chest. “This place is expensive. Does he always go to the most expensive hotels, too?”

  “Will there be a problem with payment from your boss?”

  “Well—”

  The bus door pushed open. I turned to watch Jude stroll by the group of us with a bag in hand. Dark shades were pulled over his eyes. His coal hair was a fringe of messy spikes. He paid little attention to us as he walked into the hotel lobby, humming to himself. The cold shoulder. I recognized it from afar, so I shook my head at Chuck.

  “I’ll just stay on the bus tonight,” I said. “Thanks, Chuck.”

  “If you’re sure,” Chuck said, shrugging his broad shoulders. “I’m not going to push you to do something you don’t want. Just don’t wander off too far.”

  The two older men followed Jude into the hotel lobby. I climbed back up into the bus and pulled out my laptop to check my bank account. Only 232 dollars left. There was no way a hotel like this would offer a room below a hundred bucks. My editor would throw a fit if I asked for money to stay at a fancy hotel like this.

  I tapped my fingers against the table top. A few sports magazines were following Jude around, begging him for an interview. I imagined the price tag on a piece like this with one of them would be more than enough to cover hotels like this, but most of them would require a steady job contract in the professional sports field. Stumbling into an opportunity like this only happened because of Jude. He didn’t trust anyone else to do this piece about him. That was one of the qualities that I could write in depth about.

  Jude was a private man when it came to his feelings. He didn’t trust random strangers entering his life because of the wealth he had accumulated over the past few years, but no one knew it was because of his family. No one knew that Jude used to ride his motorbike down the streets on his paper route, which woke everyone every single morning with all the racket. Those were the quirks about Jude that no one knew about like I did.

  No one knew about Andy’s accident, either. He never mentioned it to anyone, besides Chuck, and I had no idea if that was out of respect for my family, or if it was guilt.

  I closed my laptop with a sigh before gathering my purse to head off the bus. Charleston was a bustling city full of history, but this hotel happened to be located in the French Quarter. I didn’t plan on staying inside the bus with my own haunted memories and conflicted emotions about Jude. I downloaded a map to my phone before setting out across the parking lot in the direction of the historic downtown district that had little shops full of various souvenirs. Trips like this were once in a lifetime with my limited bank funds.

  I spent the next few hours getting lost in Charleston. It provided a great distraction from the fact that I would eventually have to return to the bus and face Jude after our fight earlier. Why couldn’t he just let it be? Because it was Jude. When he got an idea in his head, there was no swaying it.

  My phone buzzed from inside my purse. I pulled it out to glance down at the caller ID.

  Great. Do I answer, or do I let my mom’s call go straight to voicemail? Again.

  I let it ring one more time before hitting the answer button with a sigh. “I’m a bit busy, Mom. What’s up?”

  “I’ve tried calling you four times,” she said. “Where have you been for the past few days?”

  “I’ve been working.” Lies. Horrid lies. “I’m in Charleston, South Carolina right now.”

  “That’s nowhere near New York. Does he plan on dropping you off back in Gypsum?”

  “I’ll catch a flight back to the city,” I said, rolling my eyes. “That’s the plan so far, at least. Why do you ask?”

  “I’m just curious, is all. I’m your mother, and I worry about you traipsing all over the United States with that man who claims to be a superstar.”

  “He has a horde of fans who follow him everywhere he goes. It’s safe to say that he is famous and a superstar.”

  My mother snorted indelicately into the phone. “Anyone can do what he does. There’s nothing special about it.”

  I waited for it. My mother was bursting for information. She hated secrets and not being in the loop. I could practically hear the wheels in her brain turning as she waited for me to give her something to chew on.

  “Just ask me how it’s going, Mom. I’ll tell you the truth. No need to beat around the bush over it.”

  “Your father and I are concerned about you, Ava. This is the guy who’s responsible for your brother’s death. You can’t blame us for being a bit worried that you are falling back under his spell.”

  “I’m not falling back under his spell.”

  Another lie. I had kissed Jude back three times now. Those lips were sinful. They could unravel me easily if I let them. Which was why I had pulled away the previous night before things go too far again.

  “You don’t sound very confident in that. I know how it is with bad boys, Ava. I dated one before your father, years ago.”

  I sipped at the small lemonade I had purchased in the café a few blocks away. “Well, it’s nice to know that Dad was your second pick over the bad boy.”

  “That’s not funny, Ava. I’m being serious. I know how it must be charming to see all this wealth and fame surrounding Jude, but you remember what he has done.”

  “There isn’t anything charming about this life he lives.” A shudder went through me at the memory of the stunts from the exhibition. “Trust me on that. Everything is fine, so don’t worry about me.”

  “I wish it was that easy, Ava. I really do.”

  “I already told you two that this has nothing to do with my feelings for Jude,” I said. “My lack of feelings,” I corrected before my mother could point out the obvious. “This is business. This is the key that could get me into a lot of publishers’ sights.”

  “Is your career really worth all of this heartache right now?”

  “Yes,” I said tersely. “It is, Mom. I have to pay my bills somehow.”

  “We already told you that we could help you find a nice job here in Gypsum. You could stay home rent free until you earn enough—”

  My phone beeped, signaling an incoming call. Not even sparing a second glance to see who was calling, I cut my mother off gently as possible. “Mom, my boss is calling. I’ll make sure to call you later once things settle down. I love you. Bye.”

  “Wait, Ava. I—”

  I switched over before she could say anything else.

  “This is Ava James,” I said crisply. “How can I help you?”

  “Hi, Ava James. My name is Jude Jacobs.”

  I rolled my eyes at Jude’s imperious tone. The silent treatment was over, apparently. He was up to something now if he was calling me after our fight earlier this morning.

  “I thought you weren’t talking to me,” I pointed out darkly. “What do you want?”

  “
Do you have plans for dinner tonight?”

  “No. Why?”

  “Because Chuck made reservations for the two of us at a restaurant in downtown Charleston at seven o’clock. It’s called Grits, or some shit like that. It’s a high-end fancy restaurant with good food.”

  “You don’t sound very enthused over this,” I said.

  “Neither do you,” he replied snidely. “We have to talk at some point about this piece. I’m not going to pay you to write a shitty article about me. Chuck thinks it’s a good idea if we sit down to talk about shit privately.”

  I gritted my teeth as I stared across the bustling street in front of me. Hot sunlight bore down on my bare shoulders. That was the thing about talking privately with Jude. It ended up going places that had nothing to do with the article. He was right, though. I had a deadline to make if I wanted to stay employed.

  “Fine,” I said. “I’ll be there at seven to talk. That’s it, though. We’re only talking about your career.”

  “Suits me fine. I don’t want to hash out the past, either.”

  He hung up. I stared down at my phone before placing it back in my purse. I didn’t like this feeling of not being in control when it came to my career and personal life. Jude had that effect on me because he skirted the edge of danger all the time. This time, however, he was dragging me along behind him.

  Chapter 11

  Jude

  The fancy restaurant Chuck had made reservations at was on a small corner in Charleston’s historic downtown. Twinkling lights hung all around the place as I settled down in a small booth near a room full of massive windows that was secluded from the other part of the restaurant. A stream of people walked by the windows. A few stopped to glance in at me curiously before continuing on.

  I sat back in my seat with an impatient sigh. I really didn’t want to do this tonight but Chuck had insisted that the two of us needed to stop the petty bullshit. High school was over. The past was in the past. Both of us needed to move forward, do this article, and go about our lives the way we had been going about them.